Monday, March 30, 2009

Joke: Tongue in Cheek Humour...


A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude
and  spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse
me, can you  help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago
but I don't know  where I am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering
approximately 30  feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41
degrees north latitude and  between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is probably
technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information
and the  fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at
all.  If  anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're
going.  You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot
air. You made a  promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you
expect people beneath you to  solve your problems. The fact is you are
in exactly the same position you were  in before we met, but now,
somehow, it's my fault!"

Friday, March 28, 2008

Some Dohe

Dayaa Dharam kaa mool hai! Paap mool abhimaan!!
Tulsi Dayaa na chhoriye! Jab lag ghat mein Praan!!
-Tusli Das

Chinta Aisee Dakini, Kat Kaleja Khaye
Vaid Bichara Kya Kare, Kahan Tak Dawa Lagaye

Dheere Dheere Re Mana, Dheere Sub Kutch Hoye
Mali Seenche So Ghara, Ritu Aaye Phal Hoye

Meetha Sab se boliye, Faile sukh chahun ore!
Washikarn hai mantra yehi, Taj de vachan Kathore !!

Kankar pathar jod ke, Masjid laye banay
Taa chadh mulla baang de, kya behra hua khudaey

Mangan maran samaan hai, na mange kabhi bheekh
Mangan se marna bhala, yeh satguru ki seekh

Kabira mann nirmal bhaya, jaise ganga neer
paachhey paachhey hari phire, kehet kabir kabir

Rahiman Paani Rakhiye! Bin Paani Sab soon!!
Paani Gaye naa oobre! Moti, Manas, Choon !!

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Baby It's Cold Outside - Tom Jones & Cerys Matthews

I really can't stay (Baby, it's cold outside)
I've got to go 'way (Baby, it's cold outside)
This evening has been (I've been hopin' that you'd drop in)
So very nice (I'll hold your hands, they're cold as ice)

My mother will start to worry (Hey beautiful, what's your hurry)
And father will be pacing the floor (Listen to that fireplace roar)
So really, I'd better scurry (Beautiful, please don't hurry)
Well, maybe just one drink more (Put some music on while I pour)

The neighbors might think (Baby, it's bad out there)
Say, what's in this drink (No cabs to be had out there)
I wish I knew how (Your eyes are like starlight now)
To break this spell (I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell)

I oughtta say no, no, no sir (You mind if I move in closer)
At least I'm gonna say that I tried (And what's the sense in hurting my pride)
I really can't stay (Oh baby, don't hold out)
Oh, but it's cold outside

I simply must go (Baby, it's cold outside)
The answer is no (Baby, it's cold outside)
The welcome has been (So lucky that you dropped in)
So nice and warm (Look out the window at that storm)

My sister will be suspicious (Your lips look delicious)
My brother will be there at the door (Waves upon a tropical shore)
My maiden aunt's mind is vicious (Gosh, your lips are delicious)
Well, maybe just a half a drink more (Never such a blizzard before)

I've got to get home (Baby, you'll freeze out there)
Say, lend me a comb (It's up to your knees out there)
It's really been grand (I thrill when you touch my hand)
Oh, but don't you see (How can you do this thing to me)

There's bound to be talk tomorrow (Well, think of my lifelong sorrow)
At least there will be plenty implied (If you caught pneumonia and died)
I really can't stay (Get over that hold out)
Oh, but baby it's cold outside

Monday, December 24, 2007

HOW TO SPEAK AUSTRALIAN ( I am just learning )

"If your Sheila thinks you're a bludger, buckle down and cut the macaroni."
It sounds like a food fight in the making, or a coded message meant for a secret agent. But, no, it is an example of Australia's way with words. Here's what an Australian mean:
Sheila: girlfriend
Bludger: a lazy-bones or a loser
Macaroni: nonsense

"You're a wimp if you're suss of bush tucker."
Hey, same to you, pal! Actually, it is not such an unreasonable assertion, for those well-versed in Australian slang. Here's what an Australian mean:
Suss: Suspicious
Bush tucker: Native foods; home cookin'

"Everyone likes to find a partner who is fair dinkum."
Those who succeed probably don't need a grasp of Aussie slang, or any other lexicon, for that matter. Here's what an Australian mean:
Fair dinkum: Good, true, honest, genuine

"The sudden appearance of a bunch of fives is usually a bad sign."
In Australian slang, these fives aren't the kind you can spend or take to the bank. Here's what an Australian mean:
A bunch of fives: a fist

"Despite the carefully tended morsels on the barbie, a few guests ended up feeling crook."
If you had no grasp of Australian slang, you might think they made off with the good silver. But here's what an Australian mean:
Crook: Ill
Barbie: a barbecue or grill a fist

"No proper kitchen is complete without a billy for those late-afternoon pick-me-ups."

Heavens! It's not what you think! In Australian slang, such a statement is as innocent as pie. Here's what an Australian mean:
Billy: a small tin bucket with a handle, used for brewing tea.

"Life in the big smoke leads some to speculate that the planet is bound for the Black Stump."
Especially during rush hour, you say - or those with a grasp of Aussie slang might say. Here's what an Australian mean:
Big smoke: big city
Black Stump: a mythical landmark emblematic of the end of civilization.

"A mate might be fair dinkum or just part of a conventional greeting."
The trick is to know which is which in Australian slang. Here's what an Australian mean:
Mate: A truly good friend or the recipient of the widely used everyday greeting: "G'Day, mate"
Fair dinkum: Genuine, true, honest

"A doer will saddle up and then give it the herbs."
It's not a recipe for seasoned horsemeat, but a slice of everyday Australian slang. Here's what an Australian mean:
Doer: A hard worker
Saddle up: Get ready for work
Give it the herbs: Go faster; accelerate

"After a prang, some workers might decide a sickie is in order."
That's clear as a bell Down Under, where fluency in Australian slang is a must. Here's what an Australian mean:
Prang: a minor car accident; a fender-bender
Sickie: a day taken off from work, but not necessarily because of illness

"A bottler often receives lashings of praise, but still may become ropeable."
What sounds like a reference to the rodeo scene actually is Australian slang applicable to a variety of arenas. Here's what an Australian mean:
Bottler: an excellent performer
Lashings: large quantities; plenty
Ropeable: angry or irritable

"The boomer oil might turn out to be no more than bull's wool."
Easy for an Aussie to say! Australian slang is loaded with vivid expressions. Here's what an Australian mean:
Boomer: large or huge
Oil: news
Bull's wool: an unlikely story; baloney

"A dag might be likely to carry on and on about a bad trot."
It sounds as if somebody picked the wrong racehorse. In Australian slang, however, the expression might be heard on or off the track. Here's what an Australian mean:
Dag: a boring or dull person. Bad trot: a run of bad luck

"The best time for some spine bashing might be right after frolicking with the kids on the slippery dip."
It's not as bad as it sounds. This is a case in which it might be wise to make sure your audience understands Australian slang before dropping such a line. Here's what an Australian mean:
Spine bashing: resting
Slippery dip: a child's slide

"No esky should be without a supply of fixings for sangers, including those leftover snags."
What sounds like a mouthful is actually a reasonable statement, spiced with Australian slang. Here's what an Australian mean:
Esky: A brand name for a portable portable icebox; often used generically
Sangers: Sandwiches
Snags: Sausages

"One way to avoid yakka is to wag it."
Hint: All yakka and no play is no way to spend time in Australia. That's why some decide to wag it. Then again, Australians can appreciate the virtues of hard yakka; someone put in long yakka hours creating the colorful Aussie lingo. Here's what an Australian mean:
Yakka: hard or heavy work
Wag it: to be truant or play hooky

"A lair might end up like a shag on a rock."
Then again, a lair could turn out to be the life of the party in Australia. It all depends on whether the lair puts on too many airs. Here's what an Australian mean:
Lair: A flashy dresser or a person who is behaving ostentatiously
Like a shag on a rock: totally alone

"Don't slam the boot with such force, or the bumper bars will fall off and the duco will peel."
Australians can drive you crazy when they talk about their cars, because they traffic in some odd words. Here's what an Australian mean:
Boot: Car trunk
Bumper bars: Car fenders
Duco: Car paint

"Should a bluey start a blue with a bloke, anything could happen."
In such an event, any reasonable Australian would prepare to stand clear, unless the "blue" happened to be the alternate definition in Australian slang. Here's what an Australian mean:
Blue: an argument or a mistake
Bluey: a nickname for any red-headed male
Bloke: a person, usually a male

source:Belo Interactive - Olympics

want more.. check out the audios..
How To Speak Australian - A Guide For Yanks and Canucks

Monday, December 17, 2007

Do you ORKUT ? - Best of Orkut's tips and tricks

Orkut Tricks

1.Blank Scrap
2.Writing name in a heart
3.Writing text in reverse order
4.Writing in different cool fonts
5.Write in different Indian languages
6.Fun with Orkut
7.Scrapbook Auto Refresher
8.ASCII Smileys for Orkut
9.Your name in Orkut style
10.Knowing Email ID of any profile on Orkut
11.Different Cool fonts
12.Write Anonymous scraps
13.Who added you to their crushlist?
14.Vertical Text Generator
15.Secret Message
16.Scrapbook Autorefresher
17.Coloured Drawings
18.Text Designs
19.Photo to text
20.ASCII Designs
21.Bypass word verification
22.RSS and Orkut Hack
23.Negative Posts
24.Reverse Characters
25.Invisible Post
26.Scrap All in IE
27.Post in All Your Communities
28.HTML Tags in Orkut
29.Invisible Name
30.Add More Than 1000 Friend's
31.Orkut Medal's
32.Stop Spam in Scrap All
33.View Locked Album

Javascript Tricks

1.Coloured Messages
2.Cool fonts
3.Display Image expander
4.Make Friends images double the size
5.Funny scripts
6.Self Scrapbook Flooder
7.Decrease count of posts in a Community Topic
8.Scrapbook flooder
9.Delete topic's from a community
10.FAN Flooder
11.Browser Earthquake
12.Testimonial Flooder
13.Long name in Profile
14.Add Yourself
15.Hide Your Country Name
16.Vertical Text in Colours
17.Poll Flooder
18.Scrap All
19.Create a Topic
20.Add a Friend
21.Double Flooder
22.Captcha Cracking and coloufull Writting
23.Know Your GID
24.Capture UID's From Friend's List and Community Members
25.Add yourself as MOD in your community
26.Capture Topics
27.Accept and Reject Testimonials
28.Delete Videos
29.Text Blink
30.Mass Join Communities
31.Add Related Community
32.Larger About Me
33.Capture All Names in Friend's List
34.Add 13 Related Communites
35.Delete All Scraps
36.Testi All
37.Accept all Friend's
38.Add/Empty All in crush list
39.Album Hack
40.Big ScrapBook

Mozilla Scripts

1.Scrap Flooder script
2.No Donut for you
3.Colourful Scrapflooder
4.Scrap book searcher
5.Community Topic searcher
6.Fan Flooder
7.Orkut Scrapper 2.0.4
8.Orkut Toolbar 1.2
9.Scrapbook flooder
10.Make Orkut beautiful
13.One click Add to friend list
14.Barre de
16.Show image in scrapbook
17.Iframe in Orkut
18.Scrap checker
19.Aamiz Write
20.Add a signature
21.Video in scrap
22.Orkut Helper
23.MyOrkut link in homepage
24.TIO MP3 Player
26.Medal in your profile
27.Scrap Deleter
28.Add Related Community by it's ID
29.Delete Multiple Friend's
30.View First and Last Posts
31.Orkut Quote
33.By Pass Orkut Image Verification
34.Quick Adder
35.NoBody Profile Creator
36.Rapid Message Deleter
38.Automatically Go to Last Page of the Topic on Reply
39.Image in Signature
40.Add GTalk gadget inside Orkut
41.Add Picassa Slideshow on Orkut Profile
42.Add Template to your Scrap
43.Glitter Toolbar
44.Keyboard Shortcuts for Orkut
45.Yahoo and MSN Smilies
46.Add an Ajaxified Dictionary on Orkut
47.Post All Communities
48.All in One Scrapper

Orkut Softwares

2.Orkut cute
3.Cyber Scrap Flooder
4.Orkut Official Toolbar
5.Profile visitor Increaser
6.Vijay's Scrap Flooder
7.TIO Flooder
8.SAR Profile Creator
9.Vijay's Friend Adder
10.TIO ScrapFormatter
11.SAR Flooder
12.Vijay's Profile Creator
13.TIO Friend Adder
14.Agent Orkut
15.MyOrkut Toolbar
16.Meetul's Flooder
17.Meetul's Community Joiner
18.Meetul's Fan's and Rating's Flooder
19.Meetul's Robot Abusser
20.Meetul's Profile Maker
21.Meetul's Friend Acceptor
22.Vijay's Friend Rejecter
23.TIO's Pro Builder
24.Accept Pending Friend's
25.TIO Fan Flooder
27.Mass Friend Adder
28.Orkut Buddy
29.Tree's FM
30.Community Spammer
31.AutoPoll Contest Voter
32.Online Friend Finder

Other Tools


2.Scrap All

3.Orkut Skins (18)


5. AZ Orkut Toolbar

* Tricks indicated in red color are no more working. They are moved to Archive for developers purpose.

Everything over here has been just 'taken' from

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

All those Widget Links

I am Listing here down the most of widget tools you get to add to the blogs. Please let me know if there are any cool widgets you using and not listed here.
  • 3Bubbles, A chating tool for blogs

  • Kalsey's Button Maker, Add a button to your blog

  • Babel Fish, add a translation tool to your blog

  • bLaugh, add a blog-related comic to your blog

  • Blog Hot or Not, add a Blog Hot or Not rating bar to your blog.

  • Blog in Space, feed your blog into outer space

  • Blogcartoons, Free cartoons to post on your blog

  •, add a Blogroll to your blog

  •, add quiz results to your blog

  • Blue-Blooded Blogger badge, get a badge for your blog that shows your passion for blogging

  • Brilliant Button Maker, add a button to your blog

  • Bunchball, add Flash games to your blog

  • Cafepress, add a store with your logo or designs to your blog

  •, Add a clock to your blog

  •, add a link roll to your blog

  •, put emoticons and smileys on your blog

  • Feedjit, web traffic and visitor map widgets

  •, add photos to your blog

  • Frappr, add a Frappr map to your blog

  • Gabbly, a chat tool for blogs

  • Gapingvoid Widget, add a gapingvoid cartoon on your blog

  • Glassy Buttons, add a button to your blog

  • Google Gadgets, thousands of different add-ons for your blog or website

  •, get a Gravatar to identify yourself when you post comments on a blog that accepts gravatars.

  •, add comments and trackbacks to your blog

  • Hello, post images to your blog. Works with Blogger

  • How Much is My Blog Worth, add a ridiculous button that shows how much your blog is worth to your blog

  • ImageShack, host images for your blog

  •, put your mood on your blog

  • Kineda Blogger Ranking Widget, determine whether your blog is an A-list, B-list, C-list or D-list blog

  • Meez, add a 3D avatar to your blog

  • Mobber, a chat tool for blogs

  • Moodsticker, a Moodsticker tracks the current mood of LiveJournal users

  •, put music videos on your blog

  • MyBlogLog, add a community to your blog

  • MyChingo, add voice comments to your blog

  • Online Button Maker, add a button to your blog

  •, host images for your blog

  • Pingoat Blog Worth Calculator, calculate the value of your blog

  •, put polls on your blog

  • Quizilla, add quizzes to your blog

  • Sideblog, add a small, seperate sideblog to your blog

  • Site Meter, add a counter and/or get web traffic measurement for your blog

  • SketchPlanet, add sketches to your blog

  • StikIt, StikIt from Opinmind allows bloggers to insert bloggers' opinions about a subject or keyword into their blog.

  • Street Sign Generator, make a street sign for your blog

  • Tag-Board, add discussion to your blog

  • TagCloud, show your blog's most popular tags on your blog

  • Technorati Profiles, add a profile and search box to your blog

  •, let others tag your blog

  • Warning Label Generator, make a warning label for your blog

  • We Love Widgets, add a horoscope widget to your blog

  •, put animated emoticons on your blog

  • Weather Stickers, add a weather sticker to your blog
  • Monday, November 26, 2007

    Take a deep breath - Skype

    Which IM do you use?

    When it comes to chating with one's friends/family staying far apart, I went through many transitions.

    My first one was yahoo messenger. An IM which had a lot to offer and went into many upgrades to offer more but so far I liked it only for text messaging. It offers(ed?) a group chat where one can join to various Public rooms created by user or by system and interact people with desired interest. Actually those rooms are created based on a number of factors like Region, Religion, Sports, Music, Movies, Dating, Belief, Education etc.

    Then I tried Rediff bol which I didn't find much of interest and has very less users across globe so limits the scope to interact with more number of people.

    Third one would be MSN messenger now, Windows Live Messenger which I find very user friendly and attractive as far as GUI is concerned. Minus points for this could be, this is not used as widely as yahoo messenger and one can not leave (or migrate all) their friend's group. Though now the Windows Live meessenger gives you the option of communicating with your friends who are using yahoo messenger as well. But again it limits the possibilities and speed of course which is number one priority in IM.

    Next I hooked up with Google Talk or GTALK which impressed me a lot with its quality of PC-to-PC voice calls. You can talk to anyone else for free who's online and has the Google Talk client with no lag as you must have experinced in case of other IMs. Integration with Gmail, Gmail has chat built right in, so you can easily switch between emailing and instant messaging with your contacts. There is much more that i can talk about GTALK but these are already here. I just love the simplicity it offers with wide range of usability.

    If you like to know about some other jabber clients check this out.

    Last and latest one, I used Skype and if I have to give points out of 100, I'll give it at least 100. Skype is software that lets you use your computer and internet connection to communicate with anyone, anywhere in the world.
    >>The Best quality of Free calls and video calls- When you and the person you're calling are both on Skype, the calls are free. Oh, and video calls are free too.
    >>Call to International phones and mobiles at pretty cheap rates per minute.
    >>Instant message when it's not a good time to talk.
    >>Yes, I could give it 200 out of 100 but i deducted some points for its complexity and the memory it eats while running.

    Till now I have been using every thing for free but I am thinking to spend on skype now. You might want to check out the Connection fee for SkypeOut calls and call-rates for different countries.

    Please share your own experience with these or any other IM too. I know there are a lot of them out there.

    Saturday, November 17, 2007

    Purple Haze by Jimi hendrix

    The best guitar track in the world of rock!!!

    Purple haze all in my brain
    Lately things dont seem the same
    Actin funny but I dont know why
    scuse me while I kiss the sky

    Purple haze all around
    Dont know if Im comin up or down
    Am I happy or in misery?
    Whaterever it is, that girl put a spell on me

    Help me
    Help me
    Oh I dont know

    Purple haze was all in my eyes
    Dont know if its day or night
    Youve got me blowin, blowin my mind
    Is it tomorrow or just the end of time?

    Who knows?
    Help me
    Come on now
    Tell me
    Tell me
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